Musings from the Journey
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 oday is the convergence of two holidays associated with the masculine or yang energies: Father's Day and the Summer Solstice.
Happy Father's Day and Solstice if you are celebrating today! I invite you to reflect on qualities of the Divine Masculine today. No matter our gender, we all are a mix of qualities of masculine and feminine, or rather, human qualities. In some ways, I prefer to use the language of yang (and yin) to describe these attributes, because it can help us transcend gender a bit more. Yang is associated with the sun, our inner fire, being active, outward, direct, assertive, protective. Yang and yin, masculine and feminine don't exist within a vacuum. They relate with each other, are dynamic, and ideally are balanced. We are each a mix of these qualities. When we honor their interrelatedness, without hierarchy, we move towards harmony. We live in a time when there is still a lot of distortion of these qualities, placing some on a pedestal higher than others, or dictating who is allowed to embody what based on gender. Exploring how we can move into healthier dynamics within ourselves, and in our personal relationships will ripple into the whole. What does the Divine Masculine mean to you? Where does it currently show up in your life, and how might you cultivate (or hone) a healthy connection with it? Share your thoughts. With Warmth, Sarah
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 I've been writing a lot lately about an unhealthy relationship dynamic I was in years ago. See my posts: An Explanation is Not an Excuse, and The Best Apology. What can I say, I'm inspired! ;) I garnered a lot of hard-fought wisdom from that relationship, and the juices are flowing now that I opened the gates. Can you relate? If so, hugs.
If you missed those posts, the essence is I participated in a dynamic that would feel fine for a while. Then, tick, tick, tick, boom! Lash out. Apologies, contrition. Things calm for a while, repeat. This person was dear to me. We would laugh and have deep conversations. But the smallest thing I would do could also set this person off. Sometimes they would imbibe a little to much, and the scales would tip. They would treat me as if I was their mortal enemy, and not someone dear to them. I never really knew which side of this person I was going to get. Would I get the person I loved, and had fun with, or the one that would lacerate me with their words? Sometimes I could predict what was coming, other times it would take me off guard. After many years of this dynamic, information finally soaked into my consciousness that would help me, once and for all, break the cycle. I was listening to a YouTube video about trauma bonds from Put the Shovel Down, a channel about helping people get into recovery from addiction. It explained how the unpredictable highs and lows of some relationships, can make them addictive. Not knowing what side of someone is going to show up is a bit of a gamble. Especially when there are good experiences mixed in there, you're always hoping for that. You never fully let go of the potential that this might happen, even when you get hurt by the alternative. The term for this is intermittent reinforcement. It's what makes it so hard to leave a relationship that isn't good for you. It might be good sometimes, even though it's really bad at other times. Or, maybe it's mostly bad now, but it was really good in the beginning, and you keep hoping for that euphoria to come back, maybe this time. What helped me leave was acknowledging that if I wanted this person to get into recovery, so did I. Viewing myself as addicted to that relationship, sobered me up to do the really hard thing. I left, and knew it might be as hard as anyone else who was trying to get clean, but I was committed to getting better. This is one of the reasons why is it difficult for so many people to truly leave abusive relationships. Or why, they might leave for a while, but somehow find their way back to their abuser. The dynamic is so addictive. It's not as simple as acknowledging this person (or this substance) is hurting me, so I'm done. For the dynamic to truly end, lots of support, commitment, and grace from the Divine are needed. I share these personal lessons not for sympathy or kudos, but because it is not uncommon for me to be working with a client, and as we are talking, they share their own version of this dynamic. Eventually, I might disclose that I understand personally, and this insight about intermittent reinforcement. Many folks have never heard of this phenomena before, and it is like a light bulb. This knowing can also take away some of the shame and confusion. Whether you have found yourself in these shoes before, or know someone else who has, I hope this brings another layer of understanding, and compassion. If needed, I hope it also helps propel you to explore strategies that might help you get out of something if it's not healthy. You deserve love, safety, compassion, and accountability. You got this, and if you need someone in your corner, I'm here. Sarah  It's Earth Day this Wednesday April 22nd, and Arbor Day follows on Friday the 24th. This is a great time to deepen your connection with the Earth and the land around you. We are in relationship with all the living beings around us, and we rely on the earth for our needs.
What is one way that you can cultivate a loving relationship with the Earth this week? Some ideas:
Have fun, and delight in what you experience. Your Neighborhood Hippie, ;) Sarah P.S. Looking for a session? I still have a few openings this week:
P.P.S. The next round of Reiki training starts June 27th. Perhaps you'd like to join us? Who are the beings that support you?  Today, and all days, I would like to acknowledge and give thanks to the many nature beings that support me. Lake Koshkonong, the surrounding springs and marshes, and Wingra Creek. Steady oak, maple, shagbark hickory, black cherry, mulberry, paper birch, red and white pine, hemlock, ash, cottonwood, poplar, and norway spruce. Yarrow, mugwort, tulsi, solomon's plume, blue vervain, sweetgrass, cedar, sage, lavender, hyssop. The beings of our garden, raspberry, strawberry, honeyberry, little blue stem, rose, Solomon's seal, violet, motherwort, dandelion, cleavers, daffodil, tulip, those awaiting emergence, the wriglers and crawlers in our soil, the stones, moss, fungi, and the many potted plants, and seedlings growing by our patio window. The sun, moon, and stars, the clouds, and weather patterns that pass through. I give thanks to the birds going about their spring rituals whether they be song, migratory, or predatory. The squirrels, chipmunks, groundhogs, and butterflies. The muskrats, beavers, deer, and fox. I give thanks to the plant and animal beings that have given their life to feed and sustain me. To the wood, and stone beings that create and hold us safe, and warm in our home. To the remains of ancient beings that have been harnessed as fuel or objects we use often. Of course, to my beloved furry friends who share life, home, and companionship with us. Sweet Mother Earth. To all the beings, spoken and unspoken. I give thanks to you, dear ones.
Who are the beings of nature that support you? Perhaps, you find them out your window, in your yard, or a park. Along a walk in your neighborhood, or your commute. I invite you to choose one of those beings that you feel drawn to. Carve out some time today to be with that plant, tree, animal, stone. Acknowledge their aliveness. What happens when you recognize this being's consciousness, knowing that they are more than just an object? Offer your thanks for their beauty, presence, joy...whatever feels genuine within you. Then, allow yourself to open to their love and appreciation for you. Yes, you personally. What if this being already knows you? Enjoy feeling this care, and reciprocity. If you feel inspired, leave an offering of flowers, herbs, song, or tend to them with care. If you aren't sure what to offer, ask from your heart what is appropriate. Practice listening. As we deepen our relationship with Mother Earth and all the beings we share this planet with, we grow in our knowing of how to live in harmony, and respect. These feelings go both ways. Generous blessings of healing and magic line the path when we show up willing, genuine, and open to learning. Please share with us, who are the nature beings that support you? What did you notice when you offered gratitude to a specific being, and opened up to receive in return? With love on this Earth Day, Sarah |
Sarah Barlow
Reiki Master Teacher and Owner of Embrace Your Essence Sign up for our E-Letters Here
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