When we are caught up in struggle, not really getting anywhere, it is a painful place to be. Some choose to stay in this place for a long, or indefinite time, becoming resigned to the soup they are in, perhaps even identifying as a victim. 

When a glimmer flickers within, and something shifts—a desire for change, a willingness to reach out for help—a powerful and essential thing happens. This is the key moment that this person takes agency for their life. Without claiming responsibility for our life, healing and growth can be fleeting. We can be at the mercy of others, and the winds around us. 

The moment we choose to step into our power, saying "I'm willing do to something about xyz in my life, because enough is enough, and I matter," we begin responding to the situations in our life, rather than reacting. It's as if we go from having a ship without a captain, to finally stepping up to the helm. We start deciding how we are going to navigate the storms and winds, rather than being beat around endlessly by them. This doesn't mean it's easy, especially at first, but we are more likely to get where we hope to go by setting a direction, rather than letting ourselves drift or sink at the whims of the elements. 

Perhaps, you remember a moment in your life when you went from being adrift to stepping up. What was that like for you? Did it feel like a turning point?

If we are already charting our own course, sometimes it's hard when we see other people in our life who are resigned, and not taking ownership of their life. Sometimes there's a compulsion to tow them along behind us, or hop over and try to steer their ship for them (would this make us well-meaning pirates? ;) ). But it's hard to steer two ships at once, and it really doesn't teach them the skills and confidence to navigate their own life.

Occasionally, I feel this impulse, because I'm a recovering helper, you know. My guides remind me, "Who are you to steal this pivot moment from them in choosing to take responsibility for their life?" If I just tow them around, they'll most likely just want to take a nap, and let me continue. I'll get tired and resentful, and they won't actually learn the thing.

Claiming agency for our life, responsibilities, and problems isn't the only step, but it's the first essential one. 

Are you ready to step into your power and ask for help? 

I gotchu. I believe in you.
Sarah

April is Autism Awareness Month, and I just happened to finish reading Unmasking Autism by Devon Price, so I wanted to highlight it here.

It is worth a read by everyone, whether you are neurospicy, suspect you might be, know someone who is, or value making our society a more just and inclusive place.

Recent years have expanded our awareness of how autistic folks experience the world. Many times people who have low support needs, or come from non-privileged groups have gone unnoticed until adulthood. Price really helps to broaden the stereotype that many of us were exposed to of how autism presents. Many times folks have a great deal of empathy, are sensitive, and may be able to pass as neurotypical.

For late diagnosed adults, "masking" to fit in is the strategy that they've employed to survive socially, oftentimes, having done it for so long that it's hard to distinguish from who they really are.  

Being autistic is a difference in the way our nervous system processes. Because of the nature our how our society is structured to cater to neurotypical ways of processing, it can make these differences disabling. 

Price illustrates ways that this neurodivergence impacts people of various intersectional identities and support needs. They advocate for ways that we can encourage more supportive environments or norms for folks on the spectrum. 

One of the analogies that I love as I've been researching neurodivergence, is thinking about various accommodations for these neurotypes as glasses. We don't think of someone who has poor vision as inherently flawed, or expect them to be cured at some point. Instead, we help them find the right prescription glasses to help them see the world more clearly. We could think of headphones, a calm sensory environment, or permission to stim without judgment as comparable accommodations, for example.

Unmasking Autism is worth a read, and I hope you'll pick up a copy soon!

Warmly,
Sarah

It's Earth Day this Wednesday April 22nd, and Arbor Day follows on Friday the 24th. This is a great time to deepen your connection with the Earth and the land around you. We are in relationship with all the living beings around us, and we rely on the earth for our needs. 

What is one way that you can cultivate a loving relationship with the Earth this week? 

Some ideas:

• Tend your garden or plant some seeds
• Pick up litter in your neighborhood
• Leave an offering of herbs for the land where you live. Whispering blessings and gratitude into them before you sprinkle them on the land.
• Rethink your consumption habits (start composting, buy in bulk, repurpose an item, thrift, etc)
• Advocate for the lands and creatures that don't have a voice. Call your reps. Get involved in or donate to environmental nonprofits that are working to protect the land and beings we share the earth with.
• Go on a walk and just enjoy the nature around you. 

As you do whatever calls to you, I invite you to notice the Earth as a vibrant living being. She knows you, and responds, we just have to notice and cultivate that relationship. We are nature. We are not separate. 

Have fun, and delight in what you experience. 

Your Neighborhood Hippie, ;)
Sarah


P.S. Looking for a session? I still have a few openings this week:

• Wed April 22nd: 10:00, 2:30 (CST)
• Thurs April 23rd: 1:00 (remote only)
• Fri April 24th: at 1:00, 4:00
  

P.P.S. The next round of Reiki training starts June 27th. Perhaps you'd like to join us?

So last week I wrote about a cycle I was caught in years ago with a person in my life. This person would lash out, offer a heartfelt apology, things would be calm for a while then the cycle would repeat. 

I do genuinely believe this person felt remorse for how they showed up, and wanted to do better. I gave them the benefit of the doubt, and I saw ways that they were trying to learn, grow and heal. At the time, this was enough for me to stay. I mean, I cared deeply about this person, and they weren't always lashing out, we still had good times together. I wanted to believe that they could eventually heal, and things would get better.

Despite this, the pattern repeated itself so many times, I can't even give an estimate. It didn't stop until I chose to remove myself from the scenario.

Before I worked up the courage to leave, I heard the phrase somewhere: 

The best apology is changed behavior.

I held that idea for while, giving them a chance to do something different. Ultimately, they didn't. 

So I did what I needed to do to take care of myself, and let myself soak in the idea that I deserved to be treated better. (We all deserve this!) I left. 

Taking accountability for how we show up is a really important piece in having a healthy relationship with ourselves and others. While it usually isn't easy to make a change, getting the support that will actually help us get better is essential. 

The person in my life was making an effort, so it was easy for me to be encouraged by that. However, what I eventually realized was that all of the approaches he was trying were through self-study and reflection. He didn't seek out any third-party supports that would help him see his blind spots, and hold him accountable. As such, it was easy for him to bypass what was necessary. 

This doesn't mean that we can't make progress through self-work, we certainly can. However, sometimes we really do need outside support and perspective. There are limitations to how far we can grow alone. And, ultimately, in this situation, the efforts he was making didn't result in a change in behavior—not taking his stuff out on me.  

I invite you to reflect on this idea: the best apology is changed behavior. What comes up for you? Perhaps, you have found yourself on one or both sides of this spectrum. 

How did or could you take accountability for your part? Or how did or could you set a boundary if you need to?

Need a little help on this front? Here for you, without judgment, and proud of anyone willing to do the work that is necessary. 

Hugs,
Sarah

My compassion used to get me in trouble years ago.

I'd find myself in a scenario with someone I cared about and I knew well, and they'd be lashing out at me. Eventually the interaction would shift from dumping to apologies. They were so sorry. They were lashing out because of trauma that happened to them in the past. Then things would be calm for a while. Days would pass, and eventually the cycle would repeat. 

They weren't wrong. I could see why they were hurting, and behaving that way. That person had been cruel to them. They had been through something very difficult. It all made sense to me, and I let that be an excuse for how they would talk to me, even though it would leave me upset and discombobulated to be their dumping ground. I hoped they'd eventually find healing, and it'd get better. 

Eventually, I realized that this bounty of compassion I was extending to them, I wasn't extending to myself for being in this situation. 

Also, that this person was a grown ass adult, and capable of taking responsibility for the way they show up. By being so understanding of their wounds, and not setting the boundary that I would remove myself if they would lash out, I was enabling them to continue treating me poorly.

I did set the boundary, and because the behavior continued even after, it meant I ultimately left that relationship. Finally, I let the scales balance so I had just as much compassion (and protection) for myself as I did the other person. My compassion for them didn't go away, BUT the way I took care of myself in that situation changed.

I share this, because sometimes I hear clients recalling similar conundrums. It is a very difficult place to be. And perhaps you, or someone you know, needs to hear the words that I would become a mantra for me:

An explanation is not an excuse. 

Years later, I still stand by these words. 

I have compassion for people who are suffering, and have trauma. It is real, and painful. AND, if you are an adult, in the vast majority of situations, you have access to free and professional resources (books, podcasts, support groups, therapy, classes, etc) that can help you heal. Part of healing is taking accountability for our actions, and ensuring that we don't let that cycle continue by harming others. 

Do what you need to do to take care of yourself. Okay?

Stay tuned next week for our next slogan. ;) 

Find yourself in this scenario, or another that you can use support with? Reach out!   

In Solidarity, Humility, and Strength,
Sarah

Happy Spring!

What kinds of literal and metaphoric seeds are you wanting to plant in your life this year?

Now is a great time to let the energy of the season hold our budding intentions and nurture their growth. 

If you'd like to practice a simple ceremony, you can pick up a pack of seeds to plant. Hold the intentions that you would like to grow as you place the seeds in the ground. You can put them in pots you will tend, or scatter them and let nature work it's magic.

Not all of our seeds will take root, but yet life has a way of wanting to grow. Keep an eye on them throughout the year, and tend to them if you feel called. Let these seedlings inspire you as you watch your intentions grow, and find ways to nurture them in your life. 

Reiki is a lovely way to plant and support seeds in our life. Set something up today. 

In light and warmth,
Sarah

It is wonderful when we feel comfort, peace, and calm in our bodies and minds. It's one of my favorite things about receiving and giving Reiki. While I would love for our lives to be easy breezy lemon squeezy all the time, we know that isn't a realistic goal.

In some contexts, staying comfortable in the moment perpetuates dynamics that in the long run are unhealthy. This might be:

• appeasing a difficult partner to keep the peace in the moment, but keeps both parties stuck.
• choosing another sweet treat after already indulging, and feeling the upset tummy later, and other health problems build. 
• not speaking up about injustice, and avoiding an immediate confrontation, but eventually rights slide, and other issues cascade. 

To be able to do the thing that is necessary, we have to be willing to feel some discomfort. Those feelings of anxiety, fear, anger, grief, etc. have information for us. If we are willing to sit with them, they can help us determine what is important to us. 

Then it's a bit like working out, and building your capacity to stand up, set boundaries with others or ourselves, or taking the other action that is necessary to move towards what we want. 

For clarity, I want to emphasize that with building our capacity for discomfort, I don't mean tolerating unacceptable behavior or circumstances. In fact, the opposite. As we allow our internal discomfort to inform us, and fortify our courage, our tolerance for unhealthy dynamics usually goes way down. This is a good thing. We are instead strengthening our ability to face the situation to do what is needed to shift or remove ourselves from that pattern. 

Always here to stand with you as you feel those feelings, and figure out what you need to do, and foster the courage and fortitude to do what's necessary. 

Warmly,
Sarah

Insert Your Name for Divinity/Compassionate Presence Here], 
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

I'm meditating on the serenity prayer this morning. 

I'm noticing that what's happening in the world is scraping up similar energies in our personal lives. Notably, some are facing their own traumas (old or existing) surrounding boundary violations, consent, etc. as the Epstein Files have emerged. 

Whether you are facing this or other dynamics that mirror the macrocosm in your own little sphere, tending to them with healing hands and presence will help bring mending and resolve in your own life, and send those ripples out into the whole. There are many of us doing this personal work right now, and it matters, on a small and collective level. 

Sometimes the things in the whole feel too big to tackle, and in some ways, they are, at least alone. But if we all do the things we need to in our spheres, and pull out the little pebbles in the wall of the collective that we can reach, eventually the big wall of bullshit will crumble. (Yes, that is the technical term for it. ;) )

Try not to get stuck on the extreme ends of that spectrum: 

• taking on all the problems of the world so you get squished
• not taking any agency at all because it all is too big and "you can't do anything"

Really each of us, individually, we fall somewhere in the middle. Tend to your personal world, and pull on the thread that connects you to the collective to leverage change there. With enough of us doing that we can be like an army of strong ants! 

If you haven't heard, the next No Kings rally is coming up on Saturday March 28th. Make your plans to show up and support! 

Want some support moving through the stuff bubbling up in your own world, or to have the capacity to keep showing up during these times? I gotchu. 

Maybe you want to be a healing presence yourself?
Consider our Reiki training. We are still taking registrants, and will start once we reach a decent class size. Join our waitlist, or commit by fillng out the registration and submit a deposit. 


Keep on, keepin' on!
Sarah

I hope you've been hanging in there.  

I've had some clients bringing up the Epstein Files during their sessions in the last couple weeks, and given the nature of what is coming to light I wanted to offer some perspective from an energetic lens. I have not been diving deeply into the contents of the files, but I am aware of the broad strokes, and a few instances from them. As someone who finds SA triggering I told myself a long time ago, that I didn't need to know the details of what is in the files to know they are probably terrible, and people should be held accountable. 

From the bits I have heard, this is dark, insidious energy. It is big. It is not something to play with. Take seriously how or if you learn about it. 

Think of it perhaps along the lines of Chernobyl in terms of toxicity. (In some ways, that doesn't feel like nearly enough in comparison.) It is not safe for people to be around it energetically without very thorough, and specific Personal Protective Equipment. People don't just nonchalantly walk in and out of there. 

If you are going to read or listen to information about the files, I want you make sure you are grounded, supported, and protected BEFORE you approach the information. 

• Breathe and find your center. Ground into your body and your sense of self. Remember who you are, orient yourself to your place and time. 
• Invite the benevolent energy of universal compassion, love and mercy to be with you. You may call on the Compassionate Beings of Light that walk with you to be present to help you stay grounded, and protected. (We are not just inviting any spirits, we are inviting those who hold the highest good of all, who respect freewill, and are of a divine energy.) They will also be bearing witness, and the ones offering healing to any victims, not you. Many call on Archangel Michael, or Maa Durga for help and protection. 
• Say aloud or in your mind, "I am not in agreement with taking on anyone else's energy, suffering beings, or heavy energy. I am sovereign, and stand in my power." Feel that strength and empowerment within you. You will not help anyone by taking any energy on. 
• Now imagine you are putting on your PPE (Personal Protection Equipment). Energetically, you should be wearing something like a hazmat suit. Also, imagine something around your space, so the energy cannot enter your home, work, devices, etc. 
• You might also imagine that there is an additional barrier between the information and you. Perhaps a shield or window, so you can become aware, but the energy isn't allowed to get through. 
• Revisit any of these steps as needed to fortify yourself. 
  

When you are informing yourself, make sure you are staying grounded. Do your best to keep your personal energy in your energy field, within the PPE. Any compassion or light you want to send to the victims comes from the divine energy, not from you personally. This is really important. Do not give any of your energy away. 

Also, be mindful of the negative emotions you may feel, or if you start to become fixated on the files. Those emotions may potentially feed the insidious energy that is underneath what is going on there. Some energies feed off of your negative emotions. We do not want to contribute to that, nor get hooked. 

It is understandable if you have an emotional response to what you've learned, but be sure you plan to take responsibility for that feeling. (I.e. feel your feelings of grief, anger, etc.)

Also, double check if the energy is yours. Ask your inner wisdom, "Is this mine?" If you don't get a resounding, "Yes!" say, "I am not in agreement with this energy being in my field, it needs to leave now." Feel yourself in your power, and sending that energy out. If needed, ask for help from the divine beings with you to set the boundary.   

Bringing healing to this scenario energetically is going to come from those Divine Compassionate Beings. It will take the skills of many coordinated, highly-trained, and experienced practitioners who feel called to do it with their team of specialized guides. Assume that this is energetically above your pay grade. 

What can you do?

• Contact your members of Congress, and push for the perpetrators to be held accountable. 
• Ask for help from Divine Compassionate Ones to hold this scenario in light, bringing healing and protection, and transmuting this heavy energy. (Remember this comes from them, not your energy.)
• You can repeat, "I'm not in agreement with this!" as you stand in your power. 
• Hold a vibration of love, and care for the people in your community, and the vulnerable. Sprinkle that love and protection everywhere. 
  

After you have observed: 

• Double check that you haven't taken anything on in your space or energy field. If you have, ask the Divine Beings to disentangle it and remove it safely. 
• Smudge your space, shower, shake, or do any cleansing ritual that feels right for you.
• Do something to soothe your nervous system.
• Make sure you return to your center if you were thrown off.

Also, if this is bringing up any of your own trauma history, please reach out for support. 

Whatever help you might be needing in this process, I'm here for you.

May you be safe, healthy, happy, at peace.
May all beings be safe, healthy, happy, at peace.

Sarah

Every week there is a new horrifying or gobsmacking event happening in the US. I try to write in ways that are relevant to current events and how to navigate them while tending to our inner world and the collective, but I don't have the capacity to respond to them every time. Now that my cued e-letters for Reiki training are up (we've postponed the start until we have more registrants, so let me know if you are interested!), I'm confronted again with what to write. 

I'm going to speak plainly today. 

If you haven't been paying attention, you need to now. 

If you listen to Fox News, it's time to find another source. They've been lying to you. 

It's time to find non-violent ways to respond, and repeat, ad nauseam. This is the necessity of these times. 

Minnesotans are brave. Resilient. Scared. Doing the thing anyway. In frigid, unsafe temperatures. I love them. I wish they didn't have to do this.

I know many of you have Minnesotans in your life. Check on them. Send them care packages. Protest in solidarity with them (there are many ICE Out protests going on around the country.) Let them know they aren't doing this alone.

Us Midwesterners are hearty folk. We've lived through the bitter cold and snow year after year. We care about our community, and that is showing in the unwillingness to submit to bullies who just want us to lay down and take it. Fuck that.

The macrocosm is the microcosm. Imagine (or remember) an abusive family system. The emotionally and physically abusive parent hurts one of the children. The other is the golden child (immune to the physical harm, but also steeped in the emotional harm in different ways). The child who is being hit says something, speaks out about the abuse. "How dare that child say anything?" thinks the abusive parent or enabler. They should just sit there and take it. The abusers thinks the child is making them hit them, because the child upset them. It would all just be better if they were quiet.

Well, that's the narrative for the US right now coming from those in positions of power.

Historians and political scientists have a world for it when it's a government: Totalitarianism.

From Britannica.com:
Totalitarianism is a form of government that attempts to assert total control over the lives of its citizens. It is characterized by strong central rule that attempts to control and direct all aspects of individual life through coercion and repression. It does not permit individual freedom. Traditional social institutions and organizations are discouraged and suppressed, making people more willing to be merged into a single unified movement. Totalitarian states typically pursue a special goal to the exclusion of all others, with all resources directed toward its attainment, regardless of the cost.

My work is all about healing and releasing trauma. This administration is generating so much trauma it brings me to tears. Sometimes I collapse on my floor, head in my hands, before I rally myself. 

Alex. Renee. A baby that stopped breathing from being teargassed. An autistic woman carried away as she was on the way to the doctor. A peaceful protestor blinded. Oglala Sioux Tribal members detained (they are the only ones who never immigrated! wtf?!?!). People of color (citizens and those here legally) profiled, harassed, detained because of how they look, how they speak, how they dress. I could go on and on.

All of these people, they need us. We need us. 

The Republican members of Congress have the power to stop this. There is still time to pressure them to rein in ICE. Congress: 202-224-3121. You don't have to have the perfect thing to say. You just need to call. Honestly, I find it rather cathartic hounding Ron Johnson. ;)

What I do believe in is the power of the people. You and me. There are more of us than there are of them. We are fed up, and this doesn't have to continue. We just have to be willing to do something about it. Stand in your power. Don't give it away to them in complacency or fear. We are stronger together. 

Voces de la Frontera has resources to support immigrants, and rally to protect them in Wisconsin. Donate, volunteer, get involved. We need to be ready.

Monarcha is the rapid response line in Minnesota. They need our support. 

Keep an eye on the 287g program, and speak up! This gives municipalities federal money for local law enforcement to collaborate with ICE. Because they've been deputized in this way, essentially any police officers in participating counties are also effectively ICE agents. They often also have beds reserved in their jails for detainees. There are numerous counties in Wisconsin that are currently participating at the time of this writing: Brown, Calumet, Fond du Lac, Kenosha, Kewaunee, Kewaunee, Manitowoc, Marathon, Marquette, Outagamie, Sauk, Sheboygan, Washington, Waukesha, Waushara, Winnebago, and Wood Counties Sheriffs' Offices, and the Palmyra Police Department. This is also reversible! So if you live in one of those counties, speak up and say you do not want your police department participating!

Know that I'm doing what I can to stand with you in this. I've been standing up to bullies since 1987. Standing up to these bullies has become my new hobby.

If you need help regulating your nervous system, or finding moments to recharge to keep doing the thing, I'm here. 

I'm also wanting to offer Reiki to immigrants and those being harmed by this administration. If you would like to donate funds to help sponsor folks, or donate your own Reiki skills to help, let me know. Hopefully, our little bits of effort will lessen some of the long lasting impacts of this harm. 

Keep showing up.

Love ya'll and stay safe out there,

Sarah